Monday, May 23, 2011

Loss

My good friend asked me if I would be with her as she was loosing her baby. In no way was I going to let her go through that on her own. The Doctor said she had a hole in her sack and was loosing fluid. They did not think it was going to be a good outcome. They also said because of how far along she was , she would go through labor and it would be a still birth. After that weekend at the hospital she went home. She then asked me to go back with her the next Friday. The Doctor would induce labor at that time.
I also lost a baby and it brought back many memories for me. Some new feelings as well. It was scary and very spiritual as well. As a mom you feel your baby move, you start to think of what it will look like? Will it be a boy or girl? What will the name be? The last thing you think of is having a Still Birth My baby was just a week younger then hers. I did not have great nurses that helped me, hug me, sat with me or even explained anything to me. I never got to hold my baby, give it a name or take a pictures of it. This was the opposite for her. She had very caring staff that helped with everything. She got to hold her baby, name her baby and take pics too. I was so happy for her. It is hard to go through this and not having closer was very hard for me.
We cried a lot, but smiled too. We talked about Heaven and being able to one day raise are babies.
I do believe that one day my "Little Girl" or "Little Boy" Will be in my arms. I will give him or her a name. I will kiss and hug him or her a lot. Make memories, and Love every minute of it.

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